So I had considered engaging again a bit with this site after a nice trip and feeling good. In fact, my mood was sky high and I was completely invigorated -- even to maybe talk here. But then I read the last roughly ten pages or so and decided to stop. So I guess it was a fleeting and silly thought.
People can attack and say what they wish here -- it's free speech here and it's ok. A lot of men post too much and are often insecure, but none of you know the real reason (and who I am targeting by bragging on Patreon) I specifically share certain things with Patreon. Many of you don't know how much I relish certain people that tried to harass me (and still lurk there with fake paid accounts which I find incredibly satisfying those few 2-5 dollar donations are more enjoyable for me than my highest tier one) having to read about my good life and suffering and understand the stark difference between me and them even now. (they deserve it) Others actually enjoy writing to me privately about their own life as well and even last night, two people wrote to me about their own children and their college admissions journey. I love this engagement and love how I do things overall. Maybe guys also don't understand the joy of just gossiping...not sure.
I won't change my Patreon business (especially speed). If I treated it super seriously, I would burn out. My time is managed just fine overall but most people can't/couldn't understand the delicate balance of this level of time management. I've never said I'm rich, I've said I make very good income and have set passive income goals by certain ages. For age 30, that goal is $5,000 passive income a month.
I'm not trying to make as much as money as efficiently as possible, I'm trying to be happy which is a very different metric. I'm happy with how I do things now. I'd also give up every single dollar I have right now if I could stay with the man I'm with now. Not even a hard choice, and I know that is the real good luck in my life. I think my perspective is healthy and good.
If I was chasing money and only doing my design business too I could make more money but I would likely be less happy. I would burn out doing design 60 hours a week just as much as anything else. Mixing things up and never being in a rut each day with one thing over and over is my true secret of success IMHO. (if anyone actually wants real life advice that I like -- it's this sentence. Keeping your passion is easier when you can mix up different things you love to do each day. Even your favorite food might get tiresome if it's all you had over and over day after day with no variance)
I'm sure I could OF/IG my way to even more than anything I do now too but look at how things often turn out for those kinds of women even it's possible, which it often isn't? I don't even think about my assets/account balances but only conceptualize in terms of passive income down the road. I've never shied from these facts and won't apologize for being successful and happy about it.
I do regret a few bans and was considering trying to walk back some things, but now I feel better about it. The only ban I didn't feel so bad about was the one that attacked my character directly. (implied I lied) I don't mind anyone attacking my game or even my personality and how I communicate/react to things, but I've never lied to anyone for any reason ever. Not once. Anyone that does that kind of attack/conclusion without evidence is a lazy and emotionally reactive mind, full stop. Emotional response, much more like a female than a guy. I don't know many men that react this way in life, and hopefully I don't meet too many in my years to come. Unfortunately on the other side, I can admit I've met WAY TOO MANY women that react this way.
I did feel bad about the nitpicky bans, but I want to be clear -- where I live, this kind of mind is the ultimate beta male energy, much worse than being super short, fat, unsuccessful. It is what it is, and I'm a product of this bias in how I grew up. The worst example was a movie date I had (I might have shared this before so sorry if so) when younger and it was a big time emotional scene but my date noticed something a tiny bit off about the guy's clothing (very nitpicky) and wanted to discuss that instead of the deep themes and overall narrative of the movie, and it told me a lot about his potential even though he was so damn hot. (none) So if you're counting words and/or literally noticing the number of lights or exact floor angles or other mundane things instead of big picture/visionary level thinking that helps me get better...well my reaction while overly strong is just going to be the reality.
I absolutely admit it's a bias and I should be more patient, but it's that much of a turn off. It just disgusts me (a similar analogy would be strong incest with old guy/young girl it's the same type of disgusted reaction) so I do react too strongly to it.
I won't be back for a long time if ever. I did come here in good faith to check things out.
I want to state publicly that for those that lurk and read and just enjoy the game, THANK YOU! I hope the game has brought you enjoyment and fun. Please don't write me back, I am not likely to use this account again and don't even remember my old one anymore. (that computer is long gone with the SSD crash and I don't think I even have access to that old email anymore)
I have always tried to work hard and make things fun for everyone. I really was in literally the best mood ever (otherwise I wouldn't have come here at all) and it's still pretty good, but not like before I showed up.
Sincerely though, thank you for everyone that has ever provided or given positive energy to me or the game or even other posters that have in good faith tried to share their joys/thoughts constructively.
