The story is somewhat ok, the renders need work, some characters are just left out and the worst is the writing. The conversations are unnecessarily long, repetitive and boring.
The conversation with Reina was particularly boring, it looks like the only thing they are talking about is how Yakuza's tradition and culture is and how MC is reassuring that he would do his best in everything and blah blah blah and it keeps on rerepeating over and over.
The next one with the cops was plain stupid, I mean they are investigating a crime scene where a corpse is lying on a bed for a few days giving foul odor and they are just casually chitchatting like they are in a café for a get-together.
MC is portrayed as the strongest and a complete badass but he is written very poorly. He is way too nice to everyone and a Grade-A pussy, what he needs is a bit of aggression cuz in a world he's living in, others would perceive him as weak and pathetic. Even a simple grunt is threatening MC that if he doesn't treat his lady good they'll have problems. I mean he called MC there, requesting him not to kill his sister and there he's also threatening him. Seriously, WTF.
Honestly, there are lots of areas for improvement but the main thing to improve is writing which is total shit right now.