Aside from a massive overload of grammatical errors this novel is actually really well written, and it strikes a good balance between engaging narrative/story and witty banter/dialogue. The characters personalities and looks are varied and interesting, though it there seems to be a bit of overweight in the massive titties catagory. The pacing and scene setups can be a bit weird at times, like when two random thugs just stroll into a resturant and starts harassing the piano player and mc + buddy just sits a lets it get way out of hand before getting the choice to step in. Also the time jumps are very annoying and don't really make sense. As in having fairly detailed days with budding relationships and then just take a two week time jump with no explanation whatsoever of what happens in that time, like as if the characters have no interactions in a two week period even though some of them live together. Add to that the girl who spent the night cause her home was not safe cause of a broken window and then you basicly hear nothing about her until at the end of the update where you find out her window still has not been fixed and therefore invite her to live with you, to wondering wtf was she then doing for the past 15-20 days and now you basicly call her your girlfriend is just incredibly weird pacing. A personal note is changing Olivia's hair from cute braids to old woman look to somewhat decent at end does her no favors in my opinion. MC is also a bit of a paradox, switching back and forth between super confident take charge alpha and shy awkward teenage virgin boy and then suddenly dry responsible coolheaded mature laidback dude, makes him seem a bit manic and crazy to be honest and wtf is up with his eyebrows. Anyways after this rant mostly about the negative aspects I will say that this was all in all a fun read and i'm looking forward to further updates to see where this project goes. With some polish and fleshing out this novel can become really good, and even as it is it is still enjoyable and worth a read
