Trikus

Well-Known Member
May 31, 2020
1,177
2,328
Since you won't let it go, allow a former English teacher to review your work.
Here are more overlooked typos and grammatical errors I forgot to add:
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Not in this context. You don't need a comma.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Not in the context. "say" is perfectly valid in this sentence.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Yes, there should be a comma, but, remember, using the name of the almighty requires a capital letter.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Nope, these are two separate sentences. Imagine a pause after she says "so".
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Yup, you are right.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
It does look like an error, yes.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Again, correct.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
I'm not sure what your problem is with this one. She is repeating the code phrase.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Since it is a question, this would actually require an interrobang, which can be represented like "!?" or "‽".
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
The ellipses at the start indicate there was a pause or an uncomfortable silence before she started to speak.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Yup, correct.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Correct on both.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Actually this should be "Together, with your help, we'll be unstoppable.".
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Wrong on "Officially,", correct on "leave."
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
The use of "For" is fine here.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Yup, correct.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Correct.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Correct.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
No, this one is fine.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Corrrect.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Nope, this one is fine.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
In this context, no, you don't need the quotation marks.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
This is a common error people make while speaking. While you are grammatically correct, it is something I can imagine a person saying in this context.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Nope, that is fine.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Correct.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Correct.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Not in this context.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Correct.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
The comma is fine.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Correct.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
As discussed before, the ellipses at the start indicates a pause or an uncomfortable silence before the character speaks.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
This one is fine. While there are six beers, a six-pack is a singular item. Beers would be fine if they were individal cans.

So, some you are right about, some you aren't right about. Why not join the Patreon or submit this to the Discord where it will actually do some good, and not hidden on a pirate site?
 

Youtiy

Member
Feb 20, 2019
178
214
Since you won't let it go, allow a former English teacher to review your work.
Not in this context. You don't need a comma.
Not in the context. "say" is perfectly valid in this sentence.
Yes, there should be a comma, but, remember, using the name of the almighty requires a capital letter.
Nope, these are two separate sentences. Imagine a pause after she says "so".
Yup, you are right.
It does look like an error, yes.
Again, correct.
I'm not sure what your problem is with this one. She is repeating the code phrase.
Since it is a question, this would actually require an interrobang, which can be represented like "!?" or "‽".
The ellipses at the start indicate there was a pause or an uncomfortable silence before she started to speak.
Yup, correct.
Correct on both.
Actually this should be "Together, with your help, we'll be unstoppable.".
Wrong on "Officially,", correct on "leave."
The use of "For" is fine here.
Yup, correct.
Correct.
Correct.
No, this one is fine.
Corrrect.
Nope, this one is fine.
In this context, no, you don't need the quotation marks.
This is a common error people make while speaking. While you are grammatically correct, it is something I can imagine a person saying in this context.
Nope, that is fine.
Correct.
Correct.
Not in this context.
Correct.
The comma is fine.
Correct.
As discussed before, the ellipses at the start indicates a pause or an uncomfortable silence before the character speaks.

This one is fine. While there are six beers, a six-pack is a singular item. Beers would be fine if they were individal cans.

So, some you are right about, some you aren't right about. Why not join the Patreon or submit this to the Discord where it will actually do some good, and not hidden on a pirate site?
I'll admit, that's a new one. Don't think I've ever seen someone get spell checked (grammar checked?) on this site. Personally as far as I'm concerned so long as it's legible who cares, it's infinitely better when compared to some of the Japanese translations on this site so I really don't understand. Especially if it's only minor errors spread out throughout the game. I'd like to see any of these people write a story from start to finish without any need for edits once they're done.
 

Trikus

Well-Known Member
May 31, 2020
1,177
2,328
I'll admit, that's a new one. Don't think I've ever seen someone get spell checked (grammar checked?) on this site. Personally as far as I'm concerned so long as it's legible who cares, it's infinitely better when compared to some of the Japanese translations on this site so I really don't understand. Especially if it's only minor errors spread out throughout the game. I'd like to see any of these people write a story from start to finish without any need for edits once they're done.
Normally I wouldn't do that, but this guy will not let it go.
 
4.50 star(s) 24 Votes